1. I am a mess. But it’s different this time. It’s like I’m carrying a whole lot of books in my arms and they’re sliding all over the place, but I’m still holding them. Nothing’s been dropped. Yet. I’ve been thinking. Somewhere between being 16 and now, I stopped letting myself think. Really think. I have reasons, but, anyway. Lately, I’ve been thinking. And not just thinking, doing. The other day I sat down and brainstormed. I don’t brainstorm. Or I do, and tell myself it’s useful, but I don’t write any of it down, or follow through on any ideas. But now I am. I wrote it all down. And the next day I brainstormed more. Letting myself think ideas through. I never finish anything I start. Personal things. I never do what I tell myself I’m going to do. Always letting myself down. I’ve been trying for days to take a normal portrait of my face for a friend of mine. This is as close as I got, and I still think it’s not what he wanted. I know it’s not. Wow, this post has ADD. I move (for the 13th time in 8 years) on Saturday. I’m excited because it’s a great neighbourhood, a nice place, a quiet street, very reasonably priced and great landlords. I plan to stay there for a year. If I do that, it will be the longest I’ve ever stayed in one place since I left high school. How many of you have secret blogs? I am a mess. But it’s different this time. It’s like I’m carrying a whole lot of books in my arms and they’re sliding all over the place, but I’m still holding them. Nothing’s been dropped. Yet. I’ve been thinking. Somewhere between being 16 and now, I stopped letting myself think. Really think. I have reasons, but, anyway. Lately, I’ve been thinking. And not just thinking, doing. The other day I sat down and brainstormed. I don’t brainstorm. Or I do, and tell myself it’s useful, but I don’t write any of it down, or follow through on any ideas. But now I am. I wrote it all down. And the next day I brainstormed more. Letting myself think ideas through. I never finish anything I start. Personal things. I never do what I tell myself I’m going to do. Always letting myself down. I’ve been trying for days to take a normal portrait of my face for a friend of mine. This is as close as I got, and I still think it’s not what he wanted. I know it’s not. Wow, this post has ADD. I move (for the 13th time in 8 years) on Saturday. I’m excited because it’s a great neighbourhood, a nice place, a quiet street, very reasonably priced and great landlords. I plan to stay there for a year. If I do that, it will be the longest I’ve ever stayed in one place since I left high school. How many of you have secret blogs?

    I am a mess. But it’s different this time. It’s like I’m carrying a whole lot of books in my arms and they’re sliding all over the place, but I’m still holding them. Nothing’s been dropped. Yet.

    I’ve been thinking. Somewhere between being 16 and now, I stopped letting myself think. Really think. I have reasons, but, anyway.

    Lately, I’ve been thinking. And not just thinking, doing. The other day I sat down and brainstormed. I don’t brainstorm. Or I do, and tell myself it’s useful, but I don’t write any of it down, or follow through on any ideas. But now I am. I wrote it all down. And the next day I brainstormed more. Letting myself think ideas through.

    I never finish anything I start. Personal things. I never do what I tell myself I’m going to do. Always letting myself down.

    I’ve been trying for days to take a normal portrait of my face for a friend of mine. This is as close as I got, and I still think it’s not what he wanted. I know it’s not.

    Wow, this post has ADD.

    I move (for the 13th time in 8 years) on Saturday. I’m excited because it’s a great neighbourhood, a nice place, a quiet street, very reasonably priced and great landlords. I plan to stay there for a year. If I do that, it will be the longest I’ve ever stayed in one place since I left high school.

    How many of you have secret blogs?

    • September 23, 2009 at 10:43pm
    44 notes
    1. corvi answered: All the best blogs are secret ones. There are probably just like a hundred of us, being everybody else.
    2. jebro answered: Like many others, this is my kind-of secret blog. And I can totally relate to the ‘I stopped thinking years ago’ thing, and I hate it.
    3. leilanivw answered: i’m contantly starting new secret blogs ;) i tend to forget passwords
    4. whyamihorrible answered: I have multiple secret blogs (this account is one of them).
    5. nicklas answered: Tried, couldn’t keep up the interest in maintaining it.
    6. burningfp answered: >hand up
    7. asasparrow answered: Mine’s only partially secret. (Not this one.)
    8. fionchadd answered: I have a private tumblr but I don’t post to it much anymore. I’m pretty damned honest on this one, really.
    9. tellmeastoryjewelry answered: I keep trying to have secret blogs/profiles online, but I always end up getting overly excited and telling people about them.
    10. knitwit983 answered: tumblr is my secret blog.
    11. unstoppable answered: i have a secret livejournal, but i seldom find the time to update it.
    12. sxyblkmn answered: no secret blog. but i do have a pen/paper journal i write in from time to time
    13. jacobshelton reblogged this from therealkatiewest and added:
      love Katie West, follow her for some...most honest online reading
    14. brianomnidillon reblogged this from therealkatiewest and added:
      i think secret/private blogs are...very interesting topic. on
    15. ckburch answered: Part of me thought of making my blog a secret, but I wear my heart on my sleeve, so I said “Fuck it” and people will know what they know.
    16. ravenouslife answered: I have different blogs for different purposes. I have a personal blog and a work blog, because certain things are more appropriate that way
    17. eversonpoe answered: i have a secret life.
    18. brianomnidillon answered: i shared a private tumblr for a year with the girl i fell in love with while my 5 year relationship fell apart. :)
    19. yesanastasia answered: I’ve always wanted a secret blog but I’m so terrified someone I know will come across it that I end up deleting them :/
    20. therealkatiewest posted this